Come on, I am not alone here, am I?
Oh dear Lord above, if I found it hard to reign in that sneaky mistress of time thievery before, she has surely sunk her snaggy teeth in to me good and proper during lockdown. Yes I’m talking about that dastardly foe; procrastination!
Now you would think that with all this extra time we have due to lockdown that we are racking up the big green ticks on our phone Notes To-Do list. But why-oh-why are those many hours and days that we thought were extra now zipping off the calendar like that dastardly Mexican mouse ‘Speedy Gonzales’?
How on earth is it August already? And why is there still a desk laden with half done projects in my bedroom and a sofa with an ever growing bum-dip shape pressed in to its weary seat?
I’ll tell you why. Because after talking to friends with similar questions, I have come to the swift realisation that we are all little mimics of each other but at least the consistency is comforting if nothing else.
It seems we all started off the same. Initially it was a little morbid excitement. Were we living in an episode of The Walking Dead? Never knowing if we stepped outside the door if we would make it home safe and uninfected or who could be passing on a deadly virus. So, we all camped out at home with endless stashes of emergency produce. All but bankrupting the world of its toilet roll back-log (pardon the pun)!
During this time people were super creative and productive. YouTube was full of people sharing music, art and creativity to keep us all busy. We were all pulling old unfinished products out of the cupboards, rooting around for old passwords to unfinished online courses we bought years ago and home-improving like Laurence Lewelyn-Bowen on speed. Maybe you decided to start painting again or ordered gargantuan puzzles from Amazon because; why the hell not try and put together a scenic view of a far-off castle broken in to 2000 infuriatingly similar pieces? We had all the time and patience in the world didn’t we?
Then came phase 2. The emotional breakdown. This was the period where we could find ourselves snappy, teary and despondent. All new activity was paused. The puzzle probably thrown at the wall or attacked by a scavenger cat leaving you bereft on the floor in a puddle of tears at the hours you wasted separating colours and border pieces. There just was no hope of finding the head space to carry on – so we all hit the bottle and chocolate in our PJs and hoped for the best!
Phase 3 brought us snapping out of it. Ok, not snapping but maybe peeking our chocolate-stuffed chubby, hungover heads out of the duvet. Things were opening up and we started to slowly peak outside. Activity resumed a little cautiously and maybe you were even brave enough to see someone close to you again. Another face, maybe another house! Sweet relief in small doses, but the wine still helped.
Now in the vino-induced despair at loss of normality and during the slight opening up of phase 3, we lost all motivation for those ressurected projects. Firstly, you felt there was no point and latterly you were too busy planning safe ways to resume some normality. But now here we are in phase 4, still unable to get back that action and energy of phase 1’s ‘snow day’ feel and wondering just how bloody long we are going to be online fancy mask shopping and battling plastic gloves in the supermarket.
But no more. I have had enough of this inactivity. It’s time to get proactive again people. Perhaps we are at the beginning of Phase 5 now. Ready to integrate a little outdoor time and begin revisiting socialisation (within the guidelines) but also with renewed energy to get back on track with those half-finished courses, paintings and projects. Yes it’s time to dust off that desk, make some more to-do lists, stick to them and get on it. But maybe we are done with the puzzles…please God can we be done with those blasted puzzles!
Good luck to us all from here on out. Lady Procrastination has a very wily lasso that can snag the best of us. Stay strong friends!